Alright, I think I might have to explain why I've been on and off active lately, I don't think it's worth being silent about this anymore since it'll make a lot more sense when the reason is out rather than kept in. I really didn't want to talk about this, especially since I've hated having to open up about myself online, but the situation has been getting out of hand and so far, the only improvements made to it all is the fact I'm getting authorities to deal with this matter.

Heads up: some mentions of grooming ahead!!

So um, my 2025 started off very horribly to say the least. My parents discovered that some guy I was really close with online had some really creepy vibes and I happened to not notice them, thinking he was genuinely being nice to me. We were like SUPER close; I trusted him with all my heart, but after hearing them out and looking back on the signs of grooming, that's when I realized he was trying to lure me in his trap to kidnap my at the time 17-year-old ass. Parents feared for my safety and took my devices away for a bit before replacing them with new ones a week or two later and they're even getting the law involved in all this as of writing. I managed to recover mentally speaking (thanks to having a new hyperfixation to help me out; searching for something new always does the trick for me when I'm in such a slump), but I developed an even bigger hatred of opening up directly, perhaps due to trust issues. Not to mention, I'm kind of more paranoid of opening my notifications than I ever was before; like I still got unread messages on my Instagram account, and I never have those; they've been sitting for weeks now.

I wish this was the end of it, but it sadly isn't. The guy is still continuing trying to reach out to me- now he's been trying to message me through Newgrounds DMs and having to see that shit scares me; how the hell does he know if my friends know about the mental breakdowns I had while the beginning of the situation was going on? Only my family knew about that shit and before this I never said anything about him at all. Also, he brings up that apparently there were death rumors about me even though I have been posting on Tumblr albeit irregularly, so I think with the fact I now know he's a weirdo in mind, this is all strange shit he's saying to me to try and convince me into talking to him again.

He's also been using his friend's (or hell even alt) account to make content centered around my characters and mentioned my username in them on YouTube. It's funny how he brought up all the things he had in mind that he wanted to create for me and only now he wants me to see them despite the fact I can't communicate with him anymore. It should go without saying that in the videos, he traced my art style (which honestly I don't really give much of a shit about since it's my older art style that I had in 2023 to early 2024) and also possibly made an AI voice clone out of me (which by the way, I believe I have told him in the past that I do not approve of him making AI voice clones out of me, so he's therefore disrespecting my boundaries) since my character sounds scarily accurate to my own voice despite me not having recorded these lines that were in these videos. He's been grinding to get my attention and it's fucking creepy as hell. Also, he has a fanmade account surrounding my older YT channel series that was made pretty recently, so YouTube isn't the only outlet he's spreading this shit on, I could worry about Instagram, but I can't 100% be sure on it. Thankfully, my family has sent out legal threats to him telling him to stop making that shit on YouTube and I hid those accounts from my channel, so hopefully he'll quit with the bullshit and leave me alone lmao. I did archive the few that are still up albeit unlisted so he can't 100% get away with it and so I can show in case anyone needs proof of anything here lol.

So yeah, that's why I haven't been online much, just scared that the next notification I get will come from him or any of his alts lmao. I have a lot of doodles to post, but this situation is so damn complicated, I get worried about everything when I hop online lol. I've been alright if y'all are wondering, just a little anxious to truly get back into things is all. I think this feeling of uncertainty will go away as time goes on when I'm actually confident to be posting stuff again, but until then, I'm taking it one step at a time.

Also, it disappoints me that I had a webcomic I was making pretty decent progress on that this particular person was helping me with. It would've been a semi-reboot of my YouTube series that was on my older channel, but sadly, all this happened so I may have to scrap it since it feels wrong to continue working on something that was helped by someone who was actually being creepy behind the scenes. I used to hate thinking about my older YT series, until that person came along, but now those feelings are coming back because the person who got me to like it despite me being embarrassed about it is a creep and I can probably never shake off those feelings when thinking about it now lol. Honestly, looking back, he was being controlling when he refused to accept that I didn't like that series anymore and tried to make fan content out of it for the sake of making me like it again lmao.

Okay I'm done here, thank you.